Sunday, August 9, 2009

The Three Mistakes of My Life!

On seeing the title of the post, don't think that this is an article or a review of the book titled the same, written by Chetan Bhagat. This is my emotional outcry about my own personal mistakes, which had made a lasting imprint during the course of my life. (This post might even contain some things in common with the forementioned book, but that's no fault of mine :) )

Mistake #1:

The greatest mistake of mine, as everyone who knows me would certainly know, is the choice of my Career or one could say, my choice of a course in Computers. I've never been fascinated or attracted to the intelligent box right from my childhood, as a matter of fact, I was certainly more attracted towards the Idiot box. :) Exactly four years ago, everyone whom I met kept pointing out to me that if I work hard then, that would be the last year of my suffering, as a heaven named CEG would be in the beckoning, from where life is a bed of roses and nothing would be impossible to achieve. I made it a point to realize the potential which they visualized in me, by trying to work a bit harder at that point of time. As expected, I finished my schooling in flying colours. Then, on the fateful day of my counselling, to everyone's surprise, I chose to opt for a course in the prestigious Computer Science and Engineering course, in one of the most reputed technical institutions in the country. The reason for everyone's surprise was not because of the choice of the course, as it was everyone's dream at that time; but because of the fact that it was I who took the brave decision to start a career in the field of computers.

When I entered college, I remembered all the people saying that college life is absolute fun. I tried to enjoy life to the fullest in college, but I couldn't get back the bliss of my wonderful school life. I couldn't fathom why it was, but perhaps it was one fragment of a person's growing up process. Taking up responsibilities, which I felt as an important aspect of college, is not entirely my forte during my school days, though people would say that I do that involuntarily quite well. College life looked like one hell of a burden for me, and I felt I was not upto it. I started feeling a sense of insecurity among other people who I felt, were born to study in this college. I slowly started feeling that I do not belong here and gradually went into my shell. My self-confidence and hope, both of which were instrumental in making me what I was four years back, went into oblivion and I was a pale shadow of my earlier self. I still could not understand why the main weapon in my arsenal, hope, deserted me in the last three years, but that's perhaps the only reason for me standing now in front of others with my head hung low, more so as a loser in my life. :-(

Mistake #2:

The second most important mistake of my life, I would say is my addiction to Cricket. Being born in India, it is extremely difficult for any person, or atleast boy, to be not interested in it. India is a country of more than a billion people, and more than half the population would certainly be the ardent followers of the game. That's the sheer stupidity of a country, which boasts of only one individual gold medal in the Olympics, that too coming 61 years since its independence from the British rule. Every parent in the country says to the child, "Cricket is ruining all your routines. Do not let the game ruin your exams." But as it is imbibed in the minds of the young ones, they let their heart rule their mind and get obsessed with cricket, just as I did. I would readily bunk my classes in school or college just for the sake of playing or even watching cricket. Cricket ruined me to such an extent that I went to the final exam of my Class XI Chemistry exam, some fifteen minutes late into the hall, and immediately told the status of the match to my friend who was writing the exam. Even now, this addiction of mine, refuses to wane and part of the mistake lies with me too that I don't intend to rectify it, as I'm just one caught among a billion fools.

Mistake #3:

The third mistake which I committed in my life, is my decision to pursue CAT. Most of the people, who would agree with the earlier two mistakes as a reason of my downfall, would certainly not agree with this one, as there is still room for rectifying this mistake of mine. Even I agree that there is some time before this situation too gets out of hand. But as of now, this is a certain mistake, and possibly, a show of foolishness on my part. I've never been a hardworker in my entire college life as everyone knows, but still I am taking a plunge into the CAT. People might say that I would surely make it, but I'm infact, suffering from the fear of failure. This fear is the most depressing thought that one could ever get, and none who doesn't overcome this devil, would be able to end up successfully in life. The mistake on my part is to be afraid of the aftermaths, but as everyone says, I am beginning to realize that "Fortune favours the brave". So hopefully, I would be able to rectify this mistake and make a conscientious attempt towards achieving my dreams.


[P.S :- As you could see, the mistakes are actually Lack of self-belief, Obsession and the Fear of Failure. As these don't share the starting letter, they have been veiled :) ]


  1. I am completely with you on mistake 2.... You can definitly do without the stupid game... See them, follow them but not at the cost of better stuff.

    On mistake 1, dude i have seen you in coll, perhaps only from second sem, but think i have spent enough time with you to say this: you are cool. Way more than you think you are. Maybe you had this shell but i never knew it... And you writing about it signifies that you have broken it... Welcome home man ! You are about to correct mistake 1 :)

    Mistake 3 is not actually a mistake, just taking a shot at getting an oppurtunity. My feel is that when you havent made the shot yet, you have no reason to judge it bad. Thiruvalluvar said,"Even though you miss your wonderful feat, the act of trying is a great feat by itself and will be appreciated by people!" Go ahead and do us proud da !

  2. No longish comments :) just read this...



    ur friend for life

    Dinesh K

  3. I'm very sorry to see these lines come out of such a person with potential as yourself..
    For now I can just say one thing.. This is what I'd say to myself when I'm knee deep in despair..
    "Maan kabhi, kabhi saare jahan mein andhera hota hai,
    Lekin raat ke baad hi to savera hota hai.."
    -Jaaney tu ya jaaney na..

  4. Life is hardly over...

    "We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope" -- Martin Luther King, Jr.



  5. I too have a similar feeling.. newayz, take some time to look into yourself.. ask yourself what your real passion is.. you won't get the answer soon.. [ No Pandu can answer this question :) ].. but be persistent.. think for sometime..

    After all, GOD doesn't send humans to the earth to worry about their past sins.. God sends humans to the earth to accomplish something.. everything should be all right..